Fear

One of the most difficult decisions I have made is to become a stay-at-home mom.  Fear led me to believe that we couldn't survive on one income, especially if we had a 2nd child.  As I sit home with my 3 1/2 year old and my 4 month old I think a lot about our finances and how to make it work.  I think that we benefit a lot from the choices we made early on.

One of the best pieces of advice given at a first time homebuyers course was to never be "house poor." So despite our larger income we chose a small 3 bedroom ranch in a suburb of a large city.  We have subsequently refinanced our mortgage and can afford payments on one income. 

We no longer pay for full time day care (for 2 children we would have paid over $2000 a month).  We have been able to reduce our student loans to a reasonable amount (using an income based repayment plan).  We are blessed with a friend who gives us all of her boys' clothing as they grow out of them and regularly shop at consignment stores.  My husband grows a garden and we make our own baby food.  We have a wonderful family who chips in and helps us out in a bind, some of our binds being bigger than others. 

I realize that this wouldn't work for everyone.  We have chosen a certain lifestyle.  We drive 2 used cars (one gifted by my parents).  I don't have a smartphone (or internet on my phone for that matter) and my husband uses a pay as you go phone.  We don't have cable.  But as I stand here writing this at 8am on a Tuesday I am bouncing my 4 month old in a wrap while still in my nightgown.  My oldest is playing with his own toys. 

Fear of not having enough almost kept me from making this choice.  When I left the workforce our income was cut in half.  For almost 2 years we have survived and I know that I will never regret making the choice to spend my days with my little ones.